Along comes Mary

My current job has The Frugal
A of me in crisis. What understanding the necessity o of not keeping everything it still rankles.
You see I have to choose what stays and what goes , and some of what goes still is quite usable goods.
I’m forcibly reminded of a conversation with someone I know that works for grocery store. He, also a person, what’s being forced to toss out pounds and pounds of still warm and quite edible food.

You make me wanna leave the one I’m with…

I have a job now, not my dream job as I stated before, but a job. I actually like this job, it’s dealing with the public, its different and I’m enjoying it. The main problem is the money. I haven’t made this little money since I was maybe 20. I need more money. Now I have the opportunity to go to a different job,, and I’m thinking about it. I hate to do that because it is so quick, and I know this job needs me. But I can’t sacrifice myself for a job… So I think I’m saying if the other job places an offer on the table I’m probably going to have to take it.


Stephen King, American author best known for h...

Stephen King, American author best known for his enormously popular horror novels. King was the 2003 recipient of The National Book Foundation’s Medal for Distinguished Contribution to American Letters. Taken at the 2007 New York Comicon (Photo credit: Wikipedia)


What makes me more , what makes me try everyday to do something that is hard, something that is unexpected and to some , absolutely odd. I want to be an author more than almost anything. I don’t want much, just to be god , at least to the people whose world I create in my head and then give to you, to the world. Why would anyone want to do this?  Money? sure . I mean some of the wealthiest working artists are writers. Tom Clancy, Stephen King and James Patterson are all Millionaires many times over , J.K. Rowling  is a Billionaire and the wealthiest private citizen in Britain. But then again . Melville died a largely uncelebrated, Authors have a higher than average amount of drug , alcohol and self abuse , many of your favorite books are written by people that committed suicide. So why?


I don’t think  I have any choice in the matter. At times , as I have said here, there have been times when I felt disconnected to the world and only writing made me feel connected. The times when I live in my head, the times when I argue with, make love to , shoot and kill , and run and die alone , because they are all me , all the charecters , are the things that make me feel. That is … all.


The Casual Vacancy by J K Rowling (2h)

The first non Harry Potter JK Rowling (Photo credit: Gwydion M. Williams)




Got to have a J.o.b.

I finally got a job!  It’s not my dream job but it’ll do for now.  I also got a resume that works again. 2 more interviews this week. The funny thing is now I have more than one job that is interested in me . It seems that this will always be the way… It is either feast or famine ! Rarely anything in between.
Now to get an apartment somewhere.

The weight of the world

English: A man handcuffed to a bed and blindfolded

English: A man handcuffed to a bed and blindfolded (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Fifty Shades of Grey

Fifty Shades of Grey (Photo credit: ellebnere)

I do not want to sound like a hater, I hate that I might but someone please tell me what the hell is so appealing about 50 shades of Grey? The book is written in the worst style, it twists the subject matter out of perspective and I have YET to talk to one person who is actually into BDSM or Dom/sub that like this book. So tell me who the audience is ?

That adorable little rant is just an into , I want to do the right thing, I want to be proud of my writing but when 50 shades inspires everything from movie to musicals I start to wonder. Is it better to be artistic or successful? Should you try for the nobility of real writing or should you play to the path of least resistance ?



houston (Photo credit: araza123)

Its a fundamental truths here in Houston that pedestrians and get no respect. Houston seems to regard the very act of walking as an  affront  to their way of life here. When you are like myself, carless, you have to be wary of the others, careless. Today I was nearly ran over not one not twice but three times. None of the people that v nearly ran me over even try to slow down.
They seem to regard to the fact that I was in the road as proof that I was lacking in normal human rights. Like the countless animals that I pass then have been folded spindled and mutilated by oncoming traffic, I too was at the mercy the Houston driver. The level of disrespect that Houston pedestrian receive can be summed up this way, when I got the crosswalk the driver of the black Ford F 150 screamed on the window at me to get out of the road. I, and all walkers, have the right of way. And just for the record, even if I was in the wrong, which I wasn’t, you don’t have the right to kill me because I’m in your way.

Running for my life

I need a writing partner , someone that will keep me on my track. Someone I can keep on track too because I really do work better when it’s not just about me .  I need someone that is , like myself, has the desire and the talent but something in the way of execution just isn’t happening. I want this soon because I am writing, I am WRITING a lot just not my novel.  or not as much as I would like to on my novel.



Art (Photo credit: A.Currell)





Gravity… I think that it is a very important word in my life. Both friend and bane in my life. At nearly 40 with a nearly. 100 pound weight loss, sometimes gravity is my least favorite thing in this world. My breasts lately are, to my mind, far to drooping.


Then there are times when I feel like I’m in my head so much that I feel the only thing keeping me in this world is the stubborn pull of gravity. 

Everyday I’m hustling…

Flickr friends

Flickr friends (Photo credit: Meer)


I’m carving a very strange little life for myself. I am living extremely nomadic. I have no roots at the moment and the lack there of is getting to me. I have more Friends then I have had in two decades but have less care in my life then in those two decades. I guess the thing that upsets me is that I am used to being slightly princess… Cared for… I don’t feel cared for.